Thursday, November 18, 2004
11/18/2004 09:07:00 PM

Sick since yester. Had serious "tap-running" nose and sore throat. Din slp much too. Finally today get to meet DEAR, his off day, finally. Words cant describe how | miss him for those terrible 1 week. Miss him soo much.
Met him at Clementi, he had to activate his atm card passwrd while i deposit some $$ in my a/c. Den went to Tiong bahru, DEAR wanted to go COURTS to c some MP3 player payin by instalment. Hmm.. which, i don like. Had our lunch over there. Surprising strange, | felt much better with DEAR. Den we proceed to Great World City.
Finally bought my cross-stitch. Problems start. I think | had upset DEAR. He was sad or mayb angry tt | din always remember wateva things he told me. | hate myself being like this forgetful. I din forget purposely.. it was like everything in my mind, things just like phoof, gone. I nid remainder. Tts d moment DEAR start to ignore me, while Im getting weaker.. more sick den i felt, throat gettin more dry, leg more jelly, my nose.. everything felt so bad. We din tok wen we go hm. In d bus, we were almost quite like strangers. I felt weaker den ever. Separate with him wen nth patch up btween us, I cant stand. I went to the toilet.. boomm.. tears flow. I hate myself. I was like a total shit wen i was in d mrt.
| guess there's no perfect couple tt exist. We r on rocky side always thou every1 touts we r d lovely couple.. He's hurt, Im hurt... there's no end. Every1 r greedy in some side, don't we? Frends ask me alway, how r u & him? I din really noe how to reply except, "ya, we r ok."
| hate myself. Hate y m i like tis? d way i somehow hurt him. Such simple things i will forget.. | noe i keep gibin excuse as Im like this forgetful.. but to me, dis is truth.. i don wan to lie to u.. i wan to let u noe, i don purposly forget everything abt u.. They say, couple shld b different frm each other in order to haf sparks.. We r real different in everything.. sparks appear.. but yet very tiring. I hate to think & ponder all this things in d middle of nights. I hate it. I hate myself. Sorry DEAR.

Citation du Jour
To find the Unicorn again we must unlearn old lessons, seek new paths to familiar destinations, stop and listen to guidance we have ceased to hear and look deep within ourselves for right answers.

Princesse de licorne
Known as Xianz or Fanny. Born in 30th March. I strongly believe in karma. So be kind and generous to those who needs it. Learn to appreciate everyone before you start to regret any time. Love unicorn, they are special cause it represent my beloved Dad in heaven.


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